As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
