Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Liz is crying about burritos again.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Randomize