OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Randomize