So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
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