just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
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