everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
that is very illegal...i love you.
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