omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
the day after is always just damage control
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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