it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
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