there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
