Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
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