just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Randomize
