..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
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