Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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