You're so nebulous sometimes
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Randomize
