Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
We had to coat check the pizza.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
