please come you make the beer taste better
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
