So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
she told me i tasted like america
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
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