I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
