Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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