Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
