I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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