That's intense
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize