i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
