Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
