I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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