So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
