I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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