i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
