we're chasing vodka with high fives
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
