Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
This couple is walking their pig around campus
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize
