His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize