Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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