Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Randomize
