Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
why does every cop we meet know your name?
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
