he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
