I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
