wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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