Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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