id be glad to
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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