Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Randomize
