in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
