i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize
