We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Randomize
