maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I smell like Dick and happiness
Randomize
