you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
