sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
