We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
