just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
We named our party play list daddy issues
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Randomize