She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
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