We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize